For someone who's got this knack for quickly landing jobs other aspire for, I'm also quick when it comes to losing interest and getting disillusioned.

So now comes the part when I'm at the brink of letting Noypi go and re-aligning my ambitions, since I've long ago realized I can't compromise my priorities: family, friends, choir, orgs and lovelife. I refuse to believe that I won't be able to find work where I don't have to sacrifice quality time with the group of people who matters, who makes me laugh and encourages me to be better.

I guess I've always had this petiks-slash-deviant-slash-fickle nature, where my attention span is considerably low and my tolerance level dismal. When I graduated, I longed for a good-paying job. When that required being totally immersed in work and daily dose of total energy and brain-drain, I took a few calculating steps backward and decided: Hey, I'm not happy.

And when I'm not happy, I get cranky.

So here I am, spending a week off the office, unable to decide if I should follow my friends' advice to "Just hang on", my choirmates' "Wag pilitin kung hindi kaya", Wafi's super supportive "Whatever makes you happy", or Noypi staff urging me to "Tyagain mo lang, ganyan din kami nung una."

One might consider my mood swings as bordering on the super-stupid or extremely wise, depending on the stakes. But I guess in my life, I've always had control of the stakes.

One can't be a mean, arrogant, street-smart son-of-a-bitch in his growing years only to get swallowed by the system right after school.

For now, I'm enjoying my rejuvinated social life: Choir parties and drinking binges last Saturday, reunion at gateway and Starbucks with Kathryn, Jake, Alanah and Katrina last night, another choir shopping binge later, Wafi day tomorrow, and Jaycee mode come friday.

Oh dear. I'm sooooo tamad.